Bad Parenting or Bad Children

Ladydi Zone 6A NW BC CanadaNovember 2, 2019

I am not sure if this is the right forum to voice this but here goes. I find there's a common response in Gardenweb (here as well) to blame the parenting of the child rather than the child themselves when they display bad behaviour. Of course that usually is the case but I believe, whether young or old, not exclusively as some suggest. I think I am a good parent and have taught my children right from wrong. I have one child who is wonderful and one who is not. I feel rather sick to think someone is blaming me when my 'bad' child gets in trouble or misbehaves. Just throwing that out there.

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Lars

I agree with you. There is a long debate on nature vs nurture; i.e., whether personalities are inherited through genes or whether they are molded by parents. My father thought that all children were like clay that could be molded into whatever he wanted, but that turned out not to be the case, especially with me. He certainly did not want me to be gay, and he tried his best to make me into the most macho man possible, get married to a woman, and have children. None of that happened.

I believe that intelligence is also primarily inherited, which is why people have a different brain capacity from gorillas. Education of course is important, but there is a point beyond which certain people cannot be educated. People are born with different aptitudes.

My sister's son was diagnosed as being a schizophrenic psychopath, and all of the therapists that my sister took him to told her that there was no cure. They did prescribe certain medications, but he would refuse to take them. My sister is a very successful and respected lawyer (specializing in banking law), but my nephew has been in and out of jail many times. I do not blame my sister for this, other than perhaps choosing the wrong husband, but I believe that both he and my sister are responsible for the genes that my nephew was born with, although they could not have predicted this and therefore should not be blamed.

Like Save March 23, 2021 at 5:05PM