Question 10 yr old and Victoria Secrets

If you think it isn't appropriate, do NOT second guess yourself. You are the parent, YOU make the decisions. IT DOES NOT MATTER what anyone else thinks. PERIOD. Stand your ground. That said, your answer should be to her..No I feel you are to young for that store. When I feel you are mature enough (or old enough, or whatever words you choose), we will go shopping there.

Vickey-MN

Seriously? No, that's not ok. My daughter can have Victoria Secret underwear when she is old enough to drive herself there and buy it with her own money.

I'd take a 10 yo. My sister is 12.5 years younger than me. I took her there when she was 13 yo. Not all of the VS stuff is sexy. They have nice comfortable jammies, bras and underwear. I like that they will fit you for bra sizes. They have good sales and the line of products lasts a lot longer than cheapies from the department stores. The line of lotions is nice too.

My parents were divorced when I took my sis. Since my dad had custody, VS was a functional place to take my sis to shop. I think you can seperate the place into the functional and sexy aspects. It's all in how you look at it. I don't really enjoy shopping with children in the femine hygiene products section of a store or the area where they sell birth control because I don't want to explain it. I shop in those areas because I need other products. I think a 10 yo is old enough to know that certain products don't apply to her. If she asks, I'd say those are something she can buy when she out on her own buying for herself.

My 14 year old buys her own underwear there. Cute printed cotton briefs. Decent price, well constructed. The catalogue and the store are very different.

VS is a "serious" bra fitting place. They have marketed themselves as a sexy underwear place...but the same type of thing is sold at Wal Mart...but of a lot lesser quality.
I think you are unduly prejudiced against what you hear from the stand up comics. Have you ever been in a Victoria's Seceret store?
I would venture a guess that V S would have very appropriate bars for a "beginner" and someone on the staff experienced in fitting.
There is nothing wrong with the store, you can buy clothing inappropriate for a 10 year old in any store. It's up to you to choose what's right for her....but Victoria's Secret really does have bras suitable for a beginner, little cotton un padded bras. You just have to get away from the come hither look of the models in the ads!
Give it a try....you'll be surprised.
Linda C

Here is a link that might be useful: V. S. Jammies

Personally, I wouldn't care all that much about the raraunchiness of it, but rather the expense. It's bad enough having to fork over money for name brand outside clothes, but can you afford to pay for high quality underwear and pj's? Or, would the money be better spent elsewhere? Heck, I've never even spent $40 on pj's for myself. And, how long will a 10 yr. old be able to fit into a bra she buys there?

I think there's something about overly spoiling kids by giving into their demands of having the best of quality or name brand in everything. Heck, my first bras were hand me downs from our maid's daughter. I was so excited to get them.

If she wants to spend her birthday money there, I'd let her, but, I personally wouldn't use your own money to buy things for her there. She needs to learn the value of a dollar and not become dependant on Victoria's Secret quality for her underwear needs until she can afford to buy them herself.

Some of the items of clothing that have proven to be the most expensive for me and my kids, were those that were poor quality.
I just tossed a bunch of knit shirts that were $15 from Kohls because after most of a season they were out of shape and getting wider and shorter. While I am wearing a Ralph Lauren shirt for the 3rd summer, bought on sale for about $25.
Sometimes it's better to pay more for quality.
Linda C

Here is a link that might be useful: On sale

Well, I hear you on Kohl's. I never buy clothes there, period.

But after looking at your link, I have to admit I really don't think a 10 year old should be shopping at Victoria's Secret even if she earns her own money and the stuff is of the highest quality and only costs $2. That stuff may be ok for teenagers, but not someone her age, IMHO.

Try a department store for a bra fitting and quality if you have the money; although I still vote for something like Hanes.

Consider me old fashioned but isn't this the stuff a 10 yr old should be wearing... with maybe some simple training or sport bras?

Here is a link that might be useful: Hanes

You know what the difference is? Hanes is pictured NOT on a model and VS is pictured on a provocativly posed model. Try the store with the clothes just sitting in a pile folded up...it's very different.
Linda C

Linda explained my point more clearly. The store has bins and shelves and hangers like any other store once you walk past the display windows. It's just underwear. Now, if you were asking me if your 10 year old should buy her knickers from Frederick's of Hollywood...

Maybe you should first ask yourself the question, form a child psychology point of view, ÂgWhy is she interested in Victoria Secrets in the first place?Âh Maybe, there is more going on than meets the eye; (i.e. older boys, sex, peer pressure, etc...). Keep us updated! Dr. Mom

I've shopped VS since I was a teenager. I've taken advantage of their bra sizing since I was a skinny teenager. Now, one kid later, I still take advantage of it. It is expensive, but they do have great sales. And I agree with LindaC, the quality is there. Plus, it is a 'ladies' store. It could be less embarassing learning how to put them on, types of cups, sizes, etc. Good luck to you! Christy :)

Personally, I wish they'd open up their line to include maternity! It never made sense to me that half the population can wear their products, yet they exclude the pregnant ones? Just my thoughts!

I wouldn't take her. It promotes the idea that she thinks she needs sexy underwear. Also, it's expensive.

To say that VS has nice jammies, etc. is like saying you read Playboy for the intelligently written articles.

Socks, are you kidding? You are comparing a lingerie store to pornography????

Well, considering many men use those VS lingerie ads as their pornography, I would guess socks isn't kidding.

You mean the VS catalogues or their TV ads? Wouldn't you then consider the new Dove ad's with full bodied women in their underwear or the regular circular for Hanes as pornography? BTW, Carla, can you put fact behind 'many men use those VS lingerie ads as their pornography'?

Well, I'm not sure what kind of 'fact' you are looking for other than common sense and the fact that I grew up with two brothers...

What do you think young guys use?

Actually, I found a link that may serve as a fact but am too embarrassed by the language in it to post it. You're just going to have to believe me on this one. The fact that they sell VS catalogs on e-bay should tell you something, though.

Sure I'd take my 10 year old into a VS. It's a women's undergarments store. They sell all types of PJ's, panties, bras, etc. Some of their stock is plain and some of it is fancy and frilly. She's 10 she knows what the stuff is for. She'll only make a big deal out of what is on the shelf if the parent does. It's all just underwear. Plus their bra fitters can do a better job at fitting women correctly for their support garments then I could do. NancyLouise

Common sense wouldn't call VS porn. Sorry, but you're just not selling me that it's porn because your brothers used it, or they sell it on ebay. I ran this by DH, and he said that National Geographic was better as a kid because they actual showed boobs. What do I think YOUNG guys use? Anything they can get their hands on. Does that make VS porn? Absolutely not. That'll be the day, my VS catalogs show up in black cellophane.........

It is okay to have female stores. Christy

christy,

Nudity (or girls in underwear) by itself is not porn...but the way the models are posed in VS and the look on their faces suggest a sexual nature. There is a big difference. I thought everyone could see that the girls are acting sexually suggestive in nature. Why don't you ask your husband who he would rather spend some time with...a VS model or a national geographic mom? I'm sorry. But, those VS girls are using sex to sell.

No, VS may not be hard core pornography, but many of the pictures are erotic in tone, and so, sock's comparison wasn't laughable IMHO. I think it's naive to not know what most healthy men are thinking when they see both a VS catalog or commercial...and it ain't buying their wife some new jammies. Why don't you put out a National Geo (with nude pictures), a VS catalog, and a WalMart circular (with models posing in their WalMart brand bras/underwear), and see which one your husband picks up when you are not around?

Come on. Of course VS is sexualized. Let's talk about the real question here.

A ten year old has requested to shop at VS. Find out more information. Is she asking for quality? (Not.) Is she asking for professional fitting? (Not.) Is peer pressure and advertizing molding a prepubescent child that sexy is of primary importance? Of course -. What is the child's view of sexuality and does she understand that shopping at a sexuality store won't change who she is?

I'd be sure all the issues were addressed, then I might take her there for a field trip and point out all the phony advertizing, have her help you - make it a learning experience and then make your clothing purchase based on reality. If they have the best quality at the best price, then VS it is. Most likely you'll find quality at a higher end department store as well.

Make it a learning experience for both -

And yes, the ads are used for mens' pleasure. Are you kidding me? What isn't?

No one is saying that men or boys can't have a healthy sexual appetite, the argument is if "VS has nice jammies, etc. is like saying you read Playboy for the intelligently written articles" isn't a laughable comparison. Really it doesnt even make sense. Of course they are sultry models. They're selling lingerie. Sex sells in America, your Hanes link was the same. To your Hanes link, the woman is lying on her back with her legs open! What do you think they're using to sell? I noticed how you made my NG reference into a mom. That is laughable. I simply suggested young man can't buy porn, they find it in any and everything around them. As for grown men who can easily purchase porn if they want to, they'd find NG, a VS catalog, and a Wal-Mart circular a very poor choice. I repeat. It is okay to have a female store. Christy

I don't have a problem with taking a ten year old into VS but I do have a problem with a ten year even being concerned in the least with what name brand undies she wears.

Does she even need a bra yet at 10? I know girls develop early these days and if you have the funds and like the quality of VS fine. But a 10 year old is too young IMO to be asking for specific undies.

So I think Amyfiddler is on the right track and gives good advice.

Well said Amyfiddler --

And that's exactly the point. Is the young girl wanting to look sexy? (Probably) And is that something a parent should encourage or permit? And if so, at what age?

Time for a talk about what's appropriate at what ages...

Why does a 10 year old want a certain type of tennis shoes? Or why does her mother buy a certain brant of toilet paper...or laundry detergent? When you need a new car or appliance, how do you decide what brand to look for? You look for something you have been made to believe is better for one reason or another.
Why is it wrong for a 10 year old to want to buy underwear at a store that she knows has the undies that her peers like?
I am curious about what bathing suits your young girls wear....
Linda C

No, I didn't mean to compare VS to pornography! Sorry to give that impression. But to deny the sexual aspect of the VS merchandise and advertising is like having one's head in the sand. (Now I'm comparing it to ostriches!!!! Ohhh, how do I get out of this? LOL)

"Why is it wrong for a 10 year old to want to buy underwear at a store that she knows has the undies that her peers like?
I am curious about what bathing suits your young girls wear...."

Because it is not age appropriate for ten years olds to be concerned about their underwear. They are not teenagers, they are ten year olds. Wanting to look like other kids (ie shoes) is one thing but 10 year olds do not dress out for gym, hopefully they are not flashing their undies, they are still children.

Where I live we have 10 year olds engaging in sexual activities. And you can always trace it back to one or another of these things. No father taking an active role in his DD's life,hoochie mama parent, or a well meaning mom who is encouraging her lil darlin to be a lil teenager (how cute) far too soon.

As for swim wear my DD always wore bikinis. Age appropriate bikinis meaning no high cut legs, no pubes hanging out the bottom and a fully covered booty. She started wearing suits with a contoured bra at the same time she needed a realbra. Not at size 6x which used to mean between a size 6 and 7 not what some moms seem to think it means today....a little girl running around with the word "hottie or juicy" on her butt is not cute...she's prey.

like whats wrong with a ten year old wearing Victoria Secret cuz a ten year old is pretty much a pre-teen in my opinion